Precious
by miffy92
Summary: Sequel To 'I Love You But I Am Afraid To Say It'.... Tony and Ziva Go Through A Tough Time...Est Tiva
1. Pink Lines

**Sequel to 'I Love You But I Am Afraid To Say It'**

Anthony Dinozzo rolled to his left to see his beautiful significant other. She looked beautiful with her eyes closed, her lips parted, hair tousled and not to mention the killer snore that woke him every night without fail. He didn't mind at all, her snoring beside him was one of the things that made it real that she was here and not in Israel; there was only one thing he had to convince her of.

"_Where've you been Ziva?" Tony asked annoyed at his girlfriend of two weeks._

"_The estate agent called with an apartment, I went to look at it. Why?" Ziva explained as she took her jacket and scarf off before moving to sit on the couch._

"_You are moving out?"_

"_Tony, I cannot stay here forever," she explained with a light laugh._

"_Erm, yes you can sweet cheeks!" he said as he moved to sit next to her._

"_I know we are dating Tony, but moving in together? Not now, not so soon."_

"_I love you!" he stated as a matter of fact._

"_I love you too Tony but, I do not think all my things will fit in your apartment"_

"_Then lets get a place together."_

"_Do not get ahead of yourself. When the time comes I will move in with you…without you even asking me. Please Tony, you know it makes sense" he did know that, but still it he was going to have to do a lot of convincing to get her into his apartment._

"Good morning Tony," he heard a sleepy mumble as he snapped out of his reverie.

"Morning, hey I was thinking now that you spend so much time here…" he was broken out of his speech when her lips met his in a loving kiss.

"…Morning breath" she scrunched her nose before speaking again, "Tony if you pitch another idea about moving in, you'll never see me again outside of work. Do I make it clear?" they were empty threats and he knew it.

"Come on Ziva it's ridiculous, you either spend your nights here or I spend it with you." He said as he tucked a strand of stray hair behind her ears. She smiled and kissed his wrists.

"Yet again I'm going to tell you the same thing. When the time comes I will move in with you; with or without your permission" with that she rolled out of bed.

* * *

They arrived at work just after 7.30 smiling and laughing as usual. When Gibbs had found out about their relationship; his reaction was not unexpected. He had slapped both of them up the head and said "Finally…good for you". Tony had thought he had been dreaming and had asked Ziva to pinch him, she has complained about pinching to see of it had been real or not was stupid but had complied either way, Tony shrieked like a little girl.

Abby's reaction had been expected with a lot of yay's, hugs and more yay's. She cooed at them when they walked into the lab together and winked at them when they left for the day telling them something along the lines of "OSU's going to score tonight", Tony being Tony had smirked and Ziva had her signature face scrunch; she didn't know there was going to be an OSU game on particular nights.

Now, McGee was being himself. He had tried to avoid being alone with the two. They were always giving each looks that spoke more words than the actual words themselves. He was actually impressed that they had been professional at all levels; they weren't talking about their sex lives or making out in the middle of the bullpen; which would have been a death wish on Gibbs account anyway. However McGee knew they were going to start teasing him at one point; be it today or tomorrow.

* * *

Ziva David sat on her couch staring at the white plastic stick in her hand; this was not good or maybe it was good, she wasn't quiet sure. They had been merely dating for almost four months and she had declining his offer to move in with him because, of the fear of something going wrong and now here she sat staring at the two pink lines that somehow seemed to taunt her. They were not ready for a family; at least she knew she wasn't.

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	2. Tell Me

For almost two weeks Ziva had been completely avoiding Tony. She spoke to him at work, most of the time case related and sometimes a little bit of flirt and banter and that was about it. He had to find out what was bugging her, maybe the fact that he had been trying to convince her to move in with him was getting too much for her; whatever it was he had to figure it out before it was too late.

He took a deep steady breath before knocking on her door, waiting for the door to open; it never did. He sighed and was about to leave when Ziva stood in front of him, she was just getting home; she had left work early today and only now she was getting home.

"Hey" Tony said awkwardly.

"Hello, would you like to come in?" she asked as she unlocked her door.

"Yeah, I would!" he followed her, he shut the door behind him before grabbing her arm. "Ziva, you going to tell me why you've been avoiding me?" it was more of a command than an actual question.

"I will…after I get changed out of my work clothes" she moved out of his grip before storming into her bedroom. "Tony get in here!" she shouted from he bedroom. He smiled a lightly before walking in there. Ziva sat on the bed her legs crossed like a pretzel clad in her bra and her jeans.

"You okay?" he asked as he tossed her his OSU tee that lay on her bed. She put it on before laying her head on his shoulder as he sat down beside her. "What's wrong Ziva?" She moved out of his embrace took a small piece of paper from her bag and handed it to Tony; whose eyes widened with realisation.

The sonogram image showed a kidney bean like shape, "Wow" he breathed. He wasn't sure what to feel; afraid, excited, nervous…he didn't know. He looked at Ziva, who was looking at him with a worried expression. "You are pregnant?" she rolled her eyes at him.

"No Tony I am not…there appears to be a kidney bean in my womb" she answered sarcastically making him chuckled a little.

"You left early to go to the doctors?" he felt her nod into his chest. "Why didn't you tell me earlier?"

"I did not want to scare you, I wanted to make sure before I told you" she mumbled into his chest. He combed back her hair with his hands before placing a kiss to her temple. " I am not ready for this Tony."

"Listen Ziva, right now I don't know how to feel either okay. But I know that we'll be okay; you, little Dinozzo and me" he said, an unintentional smile formed on his face. "How far along are you?"

"Two months" Ziva said, she was finally relived to tell him. Keeping it from Tony was the hardest thing she did, after all he was a trained investigator. "What do we do Tony?"

"First things first…you WILL move in with me!" she groaned, he wasn't asking he was telling. "…Then we'll talk about the rest."

"You did not get me pregnant on purpose did you…so that I would move in with you?"

"No, but I wish I'd thought of that" Tony grinned at her. He leaned forward kissing her gently and lovingly; he rested his forehead on hers. "I love you Ziva!" he rubbed the slightly swollen part of her stomach with his thumb.

"I love you too!" she mumbled "I'm sorry about avoiding you Tony…I just did not want it to slip out at the wrong moment!"

* * *

Four months into the pregnancy and the team had yet to find out; Ziva being a small woman was an advantage, she wasn't showing yet. The team knew they had moved into together, their eyes had widened when they had told them that they were moving in together. They all had the same question in their minds 'So soon'; but they weren't going to word it, they were happy for their co-workers.

Tony was finding new ways to fall in love with her; her morning hair, her hormones, her cravings and the fact that she swore in Hebrew every time she needed to use the toilet; at least six times in an hour. Her cravings were disgusting; custard and fish fingers were her favourite followed by pickle and ice cream. Her hormonal horny moods were the best; she was doing things to him no woman would dare to do, he was pretty sure it was illegal in some parts of the world. But he feared for his life when she got angry; she had actually chucked a knife at him and when it got stuck in the wall behind him by only a few millimetres, she had said "I won't miss next time".

Now they lay tangled sweaty in sheets and limbs. Ziva had literally jumped him as soon as they had arrived from work.

"Pregnancy sex is the best!" Ziva sighed as she rolled off Tony.

"Ziva you've really got to stop jumping me!" Tony said as he tried to get his breathing back to normal.

"You do not like sex?" She asked bewildered.

"I love sex, especially with you…but a man of my fine self can only take so much" she hmphed back as she rolled away from him. He wrapped his arms around her mid section just above her swollen stomach. "What're you thinking about?"

"My father" Ziva mumbled.

"Yeah, you never really told me what happened"

"He just sees me as an equipment of success, his personal soldier. He has never once addressed me as his daughter; he has actually decided to disown me and I am perfectly happy with that. I don't want him to be part of my child's future Tony!" he nuzzled her neck.

"Neither do I!"

"What do you want to name him?" Ziva asked changing the subject.

"What makes you think it's a boy?" he asked in surprise

"Because he will be just like his father, running around trying to kiss every girl he sees!" Tony laughed a little.

"…or maybe she's going be a kick ass ninja just like her mother" that earned him an elbow to the ribs. "OW!"

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	3. Tears

Ziva walked into the office repeating to herself that she wasn't going to cry.

She had one of her routine scans today and so she had told Tony that she would see him after the appointment. When Tony had told Gibbs that Ziva would be in after the doctor's appointment, Gibbs had asked him what it was for and he had simply replied 'women problems'; Gibbs knew better.

Ziva stood in the bullpen holding her tears as she searched for her significant other.

"Where is Tony Gibbs?" she asked the older man who sat at his desk. He glanced at her abdomen, which clearly showed signs of swelling.

"Went to get a suspect with McGee. How far along are you Ziver?" he asked with light smile on his face.

Ziva looked at him surprised "He told you?" she asked a little angry.

"Nope…you're starting show." He said as he moved to stand in front of her.

"Five months" just as she said that, the bickering of the afore mentioned agents surrounded the bullpen.

"…No Mc…McGoo, I would've caught him if you hadn't decided to trip me"

"It was accident Tony…I didn't do it purposely. Now I wish I had"

"Can it you two! Are you sure you want to have his kid Ziva?" McGee's eyes widened and Tony felt like he had to hide in a closet until Gibbs decided to spare his life. Tony stood next to Ziva with a nervous smile on his face.

"No…not anymore!"

"Ziva?" Tony's voice brought out the tears that she had held all this time. "What happened?"

"They could not find a heartbeat" Tony didn't care who was there; he wrapped his arms around her as sobs racked her body. No one had seen Ziva cry so much, in fact no one had ever seen her cry at all. McGee and Gibbs stood there not knowing what to do, Gibbs motioned for the younger agent to follow him as he left the bullpen. After what seemed like hours her sobs turned into little sniffs, Tony sat her on his chair, looking at her and waiting for her to tell him more. "They will operate me in about week" a lonely tear made its way down Tony's cheek, Ziva used her thumb to wipe it off. "I am sorry Tony."

Tony kissed her still swollen stomach before speaking again. "You have nothing to be sorry about…I should have had you chained to your desk; desk job should have been priority"

"Tony, nothing is going to change by thinking about the 'should have' and 'could have'" he kissed her lightly. "Let's go home Tony" he nodded before calling Gibbs and telling him that he was heading home for the day.

* * *

Tony held her all night as she cried for her unborn child, for their unborn child. He disconnected the landline, switched off their mobile phones and ignored the knocking on their doors by their friends; mostly Abby.

"Ziva…I'm not going to tell you to stop crying because I know it hurts. I just wanted to say that if you want to try for kids, I'm ready when you're!" Ziva looked up at him, her beautiful face stained with tears.

"You do not have to do that!" she said quietly.

"I want to!" she smiled lightly and moved even closer to him; if that was possible.

"It was a girl…" Tony adjusted himself to look at her "…I was going to surprise you today. Is it not ironic?" Tony sighed, he didn't know how to answer her "I have spent my life taking the lives of others and I did once stop to think about who else I'd be hurting, mothers fathers, siblings, aunties and uncles. I guess it is, what you call, Karma" Tony was about to interrupt when she continued "I guess god does not want me to bring children into this world when my hands have been washed in nothing but blood of those who did nothing wrong to me!"

"Ziva, shut up…you did what you did because you were brainwashed into thinking like a killer, like your father. It's because of him you did what you did, it was you against him…something tells me that he would have had no trouble ordering your assassination if you'd said no to his assignments. There is nothing wrong with feeling relived because you weren't ready, I am sure if we had planned this you'd look like hell right now…you would have made a great mom and you will be a great mom to some beautiful kid someday; not as soon as we thought." Ziva sat silently through his speech, "We'll get through this Ziva…I know we will"

Ziva looked up to met his green eyes; She closed the small gap that made them two people. Her lips locked onto his in a heated kiss, a needy kiss. She needed comfort and that was what he was going give her; she could use him as much as she liked. The two sad souls became one as the day became night; the sun became the moon, their moans and groans of pleasure filled the darkness of the eerie apartment.

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	4. Moving On

When Tony and Ziva returned to work Abby had taken Ziva into her arms, holding her like a doll not letting her go until Tony had spoken his concern for Ziva's lack of ability to breath.

The operation had gone successfully according to the doctor; there was nothing successful about seeing your unborn child dead. Ziva had not said a word when the doctors had shown them their daughter; she had turned her head away. She had a straight face, she hadn't shed a single tear when Tony's face stained itself with a silent lone tear that escaped his left eye; she had merely held him in her arms.

Now they were back at work. Gibbs' concerned glances didn't go unnoticed by either Tony or Ziva. McGee was restrained himself from speaking to either one of them, afraid of saying the wrong things at the wrong times. Abby hugged them every time they walked into the lab, She'd done it again when Ziva had showed up and Ziva had finally had enough of her hugs.

"Abby enough hugs…it has been over a month. We are trying to forget but you just seem to think that your hugs will make us feel better. Well, it is not working…it just keeps reminding me why keep getting the hugs…because, My child died, get over it!" she threw the folder on to Abby's desk and stormed out. Gibbs and McGee knew that she was going to snap sooner or later, and it had been sooner.

Gibbs hugged Abby before saying "She's just found a way to get it out of her system Abs, don't let it hurt your feelings" he kissed her forehead before walking out of the lab, followed by Tim. She sighed before getting back to work _'poor Ziva, she needs a hug…maybe not'_

Ziva stormed into the bullpen burning like a newly lit fire. "If anybody asks me 'how I am' one more time…I will shoot them! It has been a month, why will they not let it go? Gibbs with his concerned looks, McGee will not speak to us in fear of his life, Ducky who looks at me like I will go crazy…oh and Abby with her hugs. " Tony looked up from his paperwork. "Tony I need to forget, they are not helping!" Tony got out of his chair, he knew what she needed right now; to be in his arms.

He stood in front of her with his arms open and smiled lightly "Come here" she moved into him silently. He felt tears wet his shirt as he kissed her temple. Neither realised their co-workers watching them; all the afore mentioned.

"You think they're going to be okay Gibbs?" Abby asked.

"I think they are going to be just fine" he knew that for a fact.

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	5. Family

**OMG! I'm so sorry…I know I haven't updated for awhile and I AM sorry…really am. So here's a fairly lengthy chapter for my lovely readers. Those who are following my story 'Life as it is'…I'm sorry but I wont be updating that anytime soon. I've got my A2 exams next week…which means I need to study for that and get really good results so that I can got to my chosen uni…okay enough with my rambling. Enjoy, I hope it makes up for the long wait.**

Getting over the baby wasn't an easy thing to do for either of them; even though Tony hadn't been as forward as Ziva with his emotions. Yes, he had cried but that was about it; she knew it was killing him inside and she didn't push him; she let him be because she knew there would be possibility that their relationship would be at risk; she didn't want that.

Finally he had broken when a case involving a kidnapped 3 month old was being investigated by the MCRT and when Ziva had arrived home later that day she had found him on the couch face strained with tears, sobs racking his body. She held him whispering words of comfort.

It had been a little over 8 months since Tony and Ziva's nightmare. They gradually gotten back to normal; where laughter and happiness was allowed into their lives again. After much convincing from Tony, Ziva had agreed to stay with Tony but she had stayed at her apartment until her lease had finished before moving in with Tony.

He sat on the couch watching one of those fake 'reality' TV, where everything looks more like scripted than spontaneous while Ziva stood in the kitchen cooking and not to mention her sudden interest in singing. He was broken out of his trance when his phone rang.

"Dinozzo!"

"Hey Tony, it's me Carla,"

"Carla?" he was really shocked, he'd really thought he had a clean break from all his family ties.

"Yeah, I know you're shocked to hear from but please just listen to me okay?"

"I'm listening!"

"I'm visiting my sister-in-law in Washington in two days and I thought I'd drop by and see my baby brother" she explained, uncertainty evident in her voice.

"Yeah, since when did I become your baby brother…I mean you did walk out on me when dad treated us like shit"

"Please Anthony, I know what I did was wrong…it was selfish. Just give me one more chance; I've been trying to contact you for over an year. I got your number from your Baltimore buddy." She said the end a little sheepishly.

Tony sighed, he understood her reason but she had left him to suffer. She was still his sister and he loved her. "Okay…okay. Have you got my address?"

"Erm…No. Let me just get a pen…go on" she noted down the address and smiled, she was going to see her brother again, and she knew she would get her justice.

"See you soon sis" he hung with a sigh before going to join Ziva in the kitchen. She was swaying her hips to the music that played in the background, boy did she look sexy with her camisole that she still wore, and her pyjama shorts, he really hadn't pegged Ziva for the 'sexy-nightwear' kind of woman.

"Who were you talking to?" she asked with a smiled as she chopped the onions.

"Carla" Ziva raised her eyebrows as she turned to face him, he smiled before explaining further "My older sister…she's coming over in a couple of days!"

"Oh…I did not know you had a sister!" she said surprise clearly evident in her voice. When she had seen his dossier all those years ago, she was sure it had said that he was the only child.

"Don't want to talk about it" She gave an annoyed sigh before returning to her cooking. He gave a sly smile before moving to stand behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist, kissing his way down her neck.

"What are you doing?" She asked, of course she was enjoying it, but it was still fun to say no to him.

"Taking Liberty…and I know you enjoy it sweet cheeks"

"What makes you so sure?"

"You still haven't killed me…yet!" he mumbled into her neck. That was a good point; any man who so much as laid a finger on her without her permission would now be dead. "You want some help?"

"No, you go back watching useless TV. I will be fine'," Ziva said as she struggled a little to put in the onions in the hot oil whilst Tony held her. "Tony I do not want to get burned…would you please let me go. You took your liberties last night." Tony chuckled little as last night's images, a little too explicitly, flashed themselves in his mind.

Four days later as Ziva and Tony sat on the couch eating Chinese takeout and watching a movie as usual when a knock interrupted their evening.

"I'll get it" Tony stood up from his seat and opened the door.

"Hello Tony!" she couldn't believe that her brother had grown into such a handsome man.

"Carla…come in!" She walked in followed by a toddler, aged maybe five or six.

"Thank you" Carla was yet to realise the woman sitting on the couch. "How are you?"

"I'm fine…this is Ziva, my girlfriend" Carla mouthed an 'o' before taking her place on the couch.

"I'm Carla…Tony's sister and this is my daughter Isabella. Say 'Hi' Izz!" Ziva studied Carla, she was the spitting image of Tony, beautiful with brunette hair and a mix of Caucasian and olive skin tone like Tony.

"Hello, are you my uncle Tony?" Tony looked at his sister with raised eyebrows.

"You are the only family I have…I had to tell her" Ziva smiled and stood up from the couch taking the empty dinner cartons with her, she didn't want to come in between the reunion of his family. Tony watched her walk away, he knew she was giving him privacy he didn't need.

"What are you doing here Carla?" he knew there was more this visit.

"I came to see you!" Izz watched her mother and uncle before walking into the kitchen, where Ziva was.

"Oh, cut the crap. I know when you lie and you're lying now!" he shouted in frustration. "You are just like dad…lying again and again!" Tears made their way down her cheeks, she knew Tony would figure it out sooner or later.

"Listen Tony, I need your help! I found out that you work for the Navy or something. Izz's father was good man and a marine killed him and got away with it…I need your help to put him where he belongs. The bastard needs to rot in prison. Please help me!" Carla's plea brought down his anger gradually.

"When…when did he die?" he asked quietly.

"Six months ago…he was coming back from the supermarket. He was getting into his car when he got shot. Tony I didn't come here just to get his killer…I really did want to see you Tony. Despite what you think you are my brother and I love you!" he sighed there was honesty in her voice.

"Ziva we've got a case!" he called out to her. She walked out of her bedroom with Izz in her arms, who was asleep.

"Isabella is asleep!" she had heard the whole conversation and she really felt bad for Carla. Carla walked forward taking her daughter in her arms. Ziva moved to stand in front of Tony taking his face in her hands "You cannot just take the case into your hands"

"She's my sister Ziva, I need to help her!"

"I know, but we first need to talk to Gibbs!" Carla watched the interaction, her brother was the man who went from woman to woman, now he had a solid relationship; she was more than proud of him. She watched Ziva lean forward and kiss him gently, and she saw his tense body relax.

"Fine"

Two days into the case and they had found the marine's last stop and then he had gone AWOL. Tony was furious with the result, he was heading the investigation and was not happy with the result. He had snapped at McGee and Ziva; but they weren't going to let that get to them, they knew what he was going through, at least Ziva did. His sister walked out on him almost a decade ago and he wasn't going to dwell on that, she needed him and he was going to be there for her.

Ziva was getting along with Izz perfectly fine, they had been staying with Tony and Ziva until the case was over. Ziva sat with Izz on the couch who was happily colouring.

"Can I ask you something?" Izz asked Ziva as she dropped her crayon on the table.

"Of course!" as she read over a case file.

"Can I call you aunty Ziva, because you're going o marry my uncle Tony!" Ziva didn't what to say to her, she had never thought about marriage. Spending so much time around the toddler had made her think about 8 months ago, almost becoming a mother and next time she didn't want it to be almost…she had a sudden desire to hold _her _child in her arms "Ziva?"

"Erm…yes, yes you can!" It was time she talked to Tony; after all he had said he would be ready once she was and she WAS ready.

After a crap week; for the whole team, the case was finally over. They had found the marine, John Simmons to be exact, in an abandoned warehouse, he was homeless and looked like crap. Tony had punched him right across the face saying 'That's for killing my brother in law, you son of a bitch'. McGee flinched at the sound of cracking bone whilst Gibbs and Ziva smirked.

Carla had slapped him,; hard, when they walked him into the interrogation room. Ziva had taken a sobbing Carla into the break room to calm her.

"It's okay Carla, he will do time for the crime he committed"

"NO! its not okay…Jack is not going to come back. Do you know how it feels when someone you love is taken away from you?" only if Carla knew who she was taking to, she wouldn't have asked that. Ziva smiled lightly.

"My sister, she was only sixteen and my baby, who wasn't even born; they were taken away from me."

"I'm sorry…I di-"

"It does not matter" Carla hugged Ziva sobbing into her work shirt. Tony walked in to the break room with an apologetic expression.

"Hey Carla…look at me. We've got him, you can go back and tell my niece that her daddy is watching her as her guardian angel. She needs you now sis, she maybe young but she knows what's going on. She asked me if that was the man who took her daddy away from her. Go…she's at my desk" Carla smiled at Tony hugging him quickly before going to tend to her daughter.

Tony smiled as he tucked a stray hair behind Ziva's ear. "The case is over…

"…and so is her heartache all because of you."

"I had to forgive her someday!" Ziva smiled at him.

"Sometimes family is always forgivable" He sighed, knowing that someday her father was going to be part of her life again. He pecked her forehead before taking her hand in his.

"Lets go home!"

"Lets…I have to talk to you!" He looked at her with narrowed eyes, expecting her to say something. She just smiled "Home"

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